Morningside, in case you wondered, is where I live. It's also, by incredible coincidence, where my forthcoming book, DEATHWATCH, is set.
I am entirely mad. I have evidence: a folder on my laptop, entitled "Deathwatch Promotion" and 54 documents in it. And that's after I had a bit of a clean-out.
I don't need to do this. (No, I mean I do need to do the clean-out but I don't need to do all the mad promotion.) After all, I've got lovely publishers with a great marketing team who even have that rare thing, a BUDGET, and here I am exhausting myself with plans and wheezes and tasks which take a four page doc even to list.
Probably the maddest idea occurred to me one perfectly normal grey day back in March. Why don’t I see if I can set a world record for the greatest number of school visits by one author in one day, I thought. Why not, indeed? Now, as the time draws near (June 15th is Deathwatch Dash Day, or D3), I can think of reasons why not. But my problem is not that I have ideas, it’s that I tell people them, and then I have to ACT on them. So, after I’d tripped along to Vanessa’s Children’s Bookshop around the corner from my house in Edinburgh (my only house, I hasten to add - I’m not claiming expenses on a second home) and asked her to do the book-selling, she leapt on the idea - not literally - and that was it. Trapped by my own stupidity.
Apart from that, I am surrounded by lists that say things like:
- organise competition for D3
- organise different competition for all Scottish schools
- buy lots and lots of chocolate
- decide who I can face asking to look after the dog on 18 separate days
- make a list of lists
- sign 600 postcards which I've had designed for every D3 pupil
- sign 1000 other little cards for other events
- plan 9 entirely different talks
- make sure I've got enough posters for everyone
- make sure I know where I should be on any given day - this may not work
- put reviews on website
- make food for meal after launch party
- tell more people about the You-Tube video, stunning screensaver and other free downloady stuff
- get really really really scared
- check Amazon and Google. Again.
- the list goes on
- and frankly I haven't put half the important stuff on it - it looks too scary
Aghhh - radical thought alert. There's only one way to make sure no one hates it: DON'T TELL ANYONE ABOUT IT.
Why didn't I think of that?
